Unintentional Institutional Racism In Advertising

UKIP have had a bit of attention this week for alleged 'racist' adverts ahead of the European elections. I've only seen this one advert complaining about excessive EU salaries. That's a relatively safe opinion to voice. Just so long as they don't put the advert up next to something that can be misconstrued....! It would seem that in advertising, positioning is everything - in both senses of the word.

Update: It seems someone has posted this *after* me on Twitter and then had it picked up by Edinburgh Evening News. 

http://m.edinburghnews.scotsman.com/news/politics/ukip-poster-next-to-no-poles-required-tent-ad-1-3392092

The Only Flight From Edinburgh To Edinburgh Has Been Cancelled!

Oh no! Arried at Edinburgh airport early morning to find that the 08:55 FlyBe flight from Edinburgh airport to "Edinburgh" has been cancelled! I was looking forward to the shortest flight ever! 

Princes Mall Possesses Party Season - Or Can't Punctuate!

Ah, Princes Mall... That weird "shopping centre" attached to Edinburgh Waverley railway station. It seems in your quest for attention you've grabbed mine but fot the wrong reasons! So you have your own party season and you refer to yourself in the 3rd person now...? What else could you mean in this photo when you write "its party season"...? Unless your marketing team and printers don't understand basic English structures like apostrophe for contractions, such as it is becoming it's. Here's an example for you: It's a shame Princes Mall doesn't use a proof reader.

Co-op Against Independence And - Or Basic Geography Knowledge

Wow, never expected The Co-operative supermarket to come out with such an early pro-union message! Near the West End of Edinburgh, the Friday before the Scotland vs England 6 Nations game, in their supermarket closest to Murrayfield (depending on travel direction), the Co-op proudly promote a special offer on Coca Cola when you buy the Coventry Telegraph - a paper for a city a mere 300 miles away and in another country! I can't see what else this could be other than an anti-independence statement - surely no one could be that oblivious to put that out by mistake?

Taylor Walker's Classic Pub Food? Classic Mistake!

Sigh. Big companies are still making the same basic mistakes. How can you seriously not employ a proof reader with marketing / quality assurance that has a decent grade at GCSE English?

So Taylor Walker pubs have "classic pub food" do they? Well, as the possessive apostrophe doesn't exist in the third person generic, their follow up line must mean "at it is best!". Unsurprisingly that doesn't get my taste buds tingling, instead it gets my grammar goat up!

Tesco Ireland Have So Much Better Worse Deals Than The UK

Ahh, Tesco.  You never fail to entertain me.  So here I am in Ireland towards the end of last year, looking at coffee.  Whilst there are no multibuys to tempt me, there is always economies of scale.  For example, one 227g bag of 3 strength / flavour ground coffee is €3.05, but you can get twice that amount for err €6.49.  But if you increase the intensity of the coffee then the negative savings get even better!  4 flavour coffee is a steal at €2.39 a bag, but you'd have to be insane not (not) to buy twice that amount almost 3 times as much, just €6.99.  Good to see Tesco enforcing standards across their global stores...

(Glasgow) Evening Times - Haunting Sponsor of Celtic Connections

Have I been watching to many J-Horror films?  Because sitting in a lovely venue for the opening Saturday of the Celtic Connections music festival I naturally scanned around the room.  Unsurprisingly I saw a sponsor, the (Glasgow) Evening Times.  What is frightening is that the image they use has trailing blood from a haunting female ghostly face.  Start at her little finger coming off the end of her bow.  Just above, can you see two chilling eye sockets?  And leading down from her little finger, the definite structure of a nose, and below that a blood red mouth open - trying to communicate her warning from the other side...?  Apt choice of a violin to play the scary music...

The Original Nightmare Comes To Cineworld This Hallowe'en

I was sitting in +Cineworld Cinemas today watching the trailers, when I saw the iconic words New Line Cinemas in a bold red font.  It couldn't be, could it?  There's a note, then another, so soft yet so sinister...  It is!  Freddy's back in all his original glory!  This Hallowe'en in Cineworld Cinemas there is a beautiful re-release of the original horror classic A Nightmare On Elm Street.  Can't wait to never sleep, again.

Announcing The Official Technical Sales Blog at NUM6.co.uk

So this is a weird situation, where my personal world and professional world start to mix.  The technical sales, training and consultancy I set up, NUM 6, is now starting to push out useful (and free!) technical and sales training tips and advice via our new Technical Sales Blog.  It's strange having two different audiences with two different messages, but I hope it provides some value.  It's relevant if you sell anything - such as your ideas to your peers or customers or family.  Yep, almost everyone "sells" something, and here are some regular useful tips on how to excel at doing it in a sincere and honest way.  Sell well!

A Rosé In Any Other Colour Would Still Taste As Sweet

Beringer make an amazing sparkling rosé.  It may very well be one of the best summer drinks there is.  Not all supermarkets sell it, but if you see their Sparking Zinfandel Rosé you really should grab a bottle to try.  Of course, the correct name is White Zinfandel, but as with many other producers they drop the "White" to avoid confusion as it is actually a rosé wine (and has often confused many bar tenders when ordering a white zinfandel).  So that's fine then.  Well, seems that Beringer are wanting to go a step further and make their soft strawberry coloured wine look more hot pink!  The photo here is exactly the same wine but in the new bottle and branding (left) compared to the classic version.  Are they now pushing this harder to the female market and wanting to be see as "pink fizz"?  The answer is probably yes, but when you have such a delightful strawberry and raspberry bubbly wine you can do what you want to get as many people as possible to try it.

Being A Sell Out Beats Awards At Edinburgh Fringe?

Okay, this is a weird marketing decision. Tony Law had a great show last year and was rightly nominated for the top award (née Perrier, née If.com, now Fosters). So returning this year, you would assume his agent(s) would make a big deal about that, right? Well, it's strangely absent from his poster for this year's show, yet it does have space to mention his run was sold out in 2012 and 2011. Is this a sign that the top award in Edinburgh no longer has the marketing cache it once did? It's not mentioned on Brendon Burns' poster or advert, nor David O'Doherty's advert, and they both won the Edinburgh Comedy Award in previous years. Yet both Bo Burnham and The Boy With Tape On His Face (both truly stunning) highlight that they won the Panel Prize (open to almost any show). So does this mean the panel prize is more valuable than the ECA? Interesting to think about...

Martian Road Signs In Glasgow Are Alien To Me

Is this a Martian turning his head to the
side when looking at me, or is it instead the weirdest road sign in the world? Curvy lines, looping back and extra bends make navigating at the West End in Glasgow is very strange...

Guess Who's Back Beautiful? Gorgeous Edinburgh!

On the day Edinburgh is named happiest city in the UK, guess who's back to make our city life full of more genuine smiles...? It's the subversive graffiti artist / art student project with more complimentary chalking! Either that or I'm imagining messages just addressed to me at St James Centre...

Paint The Whole World With A Rainbow . Every Little Helps...

A lot of big downpours lately and some nice Spring sunshine means a plethora of rainbows popping up all over Edinburgh. They are almost as common as Tesco stores, but certainly far prettier to look at and feed my soul rather than my body.

Ireland Has Some Strange Traffic Rules, Perhaps From The Dark Side

Ireland has some strange rules… For example, during peak travel no more than 5 Imperial Tie Fighters allowed at one time. It seems they do as much damage as schoolchildren in corner shops!

A Sign People Are Ho-pin-g To Leave Dublin?

Oh dear… In central Dublin this sign is great to drum up business for attracting tourists in. Shame the socket and pins are the wrong way round for Ireland!  And for those who dispute that they could be advertising that for people about to travel from Ireland to Europe, nice idea but I saw the adaptors they were selling and they are the usual tourist sockets to Irish 3 pin plugs...

Best Gents Toilets sign ever! Or rather, best “Used Beer Dept.”...

Best Gents Toilets sign ever! Or rather, best “Used Beer Dept.” sign… Hugely impressed with The Porterhouse in Bray, and very grateful the sign is outside the gents and meant I didn't have to try and snap another photo inside the gents! Again!

Molson launches in Ireland today - Get it in The Bailey, Dublin

Molson launches in Ireland today, in The Bailey, central Dublin. Great Canadian lager with a crisp clean taste.  Just been in there having a few pints of it whilst they go through the press launch and have a few cool photos taken (the bar is kitted out with a moose's head and gorgeous white wolf).  Here's my entry for the competition they were running to snap a pic to celebrate their launch.  I even managed to get the compulsory bicycle in the shot (as every Irish-themed pub would have me believe).

Which Came First, The Chocolate Chicken Or The Egg?

Surely the chocolate Easter Egg has hatched and we know have chocolate Easter Chickens... But inside this chocolate chicken is a chocolate egg...! Either way, this is a great reason to eat your Easter Eggs as soon as possible else they may hatch and you'll have to feed the chicken and give it space to roam around.

Stocks & Shots - The Press Loved It Too!

Student, The Edinburgh Evening News and The Herald all picked the story up and ran some nice pieces on it, unfortunately the only high quality scan I have access to is from Student.  We also made a video too!

Scotland's First Stock Market Bar - 13 Years Ago Today

Stocks and Shots was an evening at The Caledonian Brewery, organised between EUTIC and SiS, which brought the first stock market bar to Scotland.  The principle is just like the real stock market - when a drink is in demand, the price rises; when it's not, the price falls.  It's that simple.  And the night was awesome - enjoy!

Google Is Spreading The Love Of Me Underwater

A treat for everyone of Valentine's Day, for any woman, man or other.  After a brief hiatus I'm back in the top four images for "person underwater".  This sexy / questionable *(delete as appropriate) pose, which is very hard to maintain underwater with your eyes wide open, is back in the top four images when searching for person underwater, which means when you enter a normal web search through Google, it offers you me as an image you may want to see!  And who wouldn't...?  Other than those people with functioning eyes...?
#egotist or #ironic or #bitofboth

The Naked Truth: Everyone Dies In The Night Garden, Or Kitchen

It's very rare that I get moved to hear about the death of someone I've never met, let alone only recently heard about.  Sadly on May 8th 2012, the incredible Maurice Sendak passed away.  He was the brilliant mind behind Where The Wild Things Are, but also some more important books and also the inspiration to the most popular young children's TV show, "Crack for Babies", aka "In The Night Garden".  Hmm, that's a rather bold claim with no other results on Google.  Let me explain.

One of the most controversial (picture) books is Maurice Sendak's "In The Night Kitchen" about a young boy who dreams and is naked throughout his dream.  In the extended interview (shown on the day of his passing) with Stephen Colbert, Maurice says his favourite book is the one he wrote about his Sealyham Terrier before her death, entitled "Higglety Pigglety Pop!".  Now let's compare the similarities:  In The Night Garden's (interesting title!) lead character is male and is the only one that is completely naked (spooky!), and his name is Igglepiggle (seriously?!).  You tell me if that isn't a huge homage to the great Maurice Sendak.  So while your children are watching their Grade A TV Narcotics, or while you don't have any children, go get a copy of Maurice's greatest book (in his eyes), and I guarantee you'll cry your eyes out reading it.

Saying White Rabbits Three Times Summons The Dark Side

On the first of the month people have a tradition of saying "white rabbits" three times.  However, just like Beetlejuice, saying "white rabbits" on any other day (like the 2nd!) summons are far darker rabbit that doesn't care that he's late.  I was going for dark, creepy, and sexy, in a Japanese-remake kind of way. Did I pull it off?  Would you follow me down a rabbit hole...?

Princess Square In Glasgow Shows Off It's (Pea-) Cocky Front

Edinburgh - I love you.  But there is something about the architecture in Glasgow that is refreshing and bold - very similar in many ways to Liverpool.  And without doubt Princess Square in Glasgow wins the award for 'Best Building Decorations Ever'!  That said (as NM pointed out), c'mon Glasgow City Council - you still have what looks like a Christmas tree up!

Getting Inspiration From The Heavens On A Crisp Morn

Pictures often say a thousand words.  In these three shots, all one thousand words are synonyms for beautiful.  I'll let you enjoy them in peace...

 

Ever Get The Feeling Buildings Are Watching You…?

They are watching us all...  And this seems to be the Queen of the Watchers, else why is 'she' wearing a tiara?  Let's hope they are watching out for us, just like the Liver Birds do in Liverpool.  On the plus side, this building can't fly away!

Is This The Birth Of A New Universe Visible To The Naked Eye?

Probably not, but "oil" let you decide... (what a awful pun next to a pretty / enigmatic picture...)

Through The Square Window Today, We Have A Crescent Moon...

What a lovely sight to wake up to.  A soft velvet sky with greens and blue, a twinkling crescent moon hanging gently to the left of an extinct volcano.  Good morning stars!  Good morning moon!  Good morning Scotland!

Scotland Has Stunning Scenery And Stunning Chillies!

These Scotch Bonnet chillies sure look pretty... And I. sure they will be pretty mind blowing later on! Thanks to Jamie Oliver I get to use them in a variation of his Christmas Jerk Pork!

It’s Like 10,000 peppers When All You Need Is A Salt...

Whilst Ed Byrne has famously asked Alanis "how big is your sink", it seems I have to ask a certain pub "how popular do you think pepper is"?  This is the 'salt and pepper' bowl.  Maybe they think all their customers are slugs, I suppose some of them are a bit slimey...

Can You Have The “January Blues” In A City As Enchanting As Edinburgh...?

Can you have the “January Blues” in a city as enchanting as Edinburgh..? Let me go for a walk and ponder that possibility...

Happy New Year! First Fireworks From Freezing Edinburgh

Taken in Holyrood Park, 2013!

Happy St. Andrew's Day - Here's That Saltire Sky Again!

Another year, another St. Andrew's Day, another excuse to post "that saltire sky" photo I took from the east end of George Street (whilst hanging out on roof tops, fighting crime).  This time it's on my Instagram profile, so enjoy!  

PS:  It's a little bit cold outside this St. Andrew's Day morning, as in -1.7°C in central Edinburgh at time of posting!

Drinking In The SECC Ain't Cheap - According To Google Maps!

The Scottish Exhibition & Conference Centre (SECC) in Glasgow is an interesting building that hosts a wide variety of events.  So Scots should be proud of it, right?  Well, not if we go by the latest review on the Google Maps place for the SECC:  "You know how much it was for a round at that fcukin SECC BTW".  I think the SECC might want to be a bit more pro-active in their social media footprint...  Or more reactive with their social drinking prices!

Living Social Offer Silly Supermarket Deal - Was £80 Now £79

Finally it has happened.. The group / social buying sites have started mirroring the supermarkets!  Not quite at the stage of Asda's "buy three and pay more than singles" or Tesco's "false multibuys", we have the "virtually nothing off the price".  Sainsbury's have for many years put out barker cards (the big signs in clear plastic) offering "1p off a high price where that doesn't help", and now Living Social are offering the bargain deal of "normally £80 - you pay only £79".  Still, they have been in this game for a while and like Poundland, they offer many "special deals" which are actually cheaper elsewhere at normal prices.  Anyway, welcome to the big boys' playground!  Still you have a long to go before you can match  and nowhere near the legendary "Sale: was this price, now more expensive"!

The Cinema Is Blue, The Future Is No Longer Orange

Whilst watching a disturbing yet excellent "romance" this evening (Rust and Bone / De rouille et d'os - highly recommend it) I was saddened.  Yet before I embarked into its dark journey I was already sad.  The final pre-film advert that ran was not the normal Orange parodying a film / film-goers who text, helpfully telling everyone to turn their phone off (not just silent - I can see your bright screen you inconsiderate yet unimportant phone addict!).  Whilst the advert was good, Kevin Bacon parodying how connected he is with the world, it was under their new guise of EE (Everything Everywhere).  It's definitely official then - this is the end of the Orange Film Board.  Let's hit those highs one more time Mr Dresden...

Instagram Web Are Live, Including Mine!

Finally Instagram have launched their own Web profiles! These pages will show the most recent 12 photos that you've taken. Sadly they don't seem to show all history at present, unlike others such as Gramfeed, but it does give you a simple one click follow me button! Unless you opt out, then your profile is coming soon at Instagram.com/yourusername - enjoy my Instagram profile here!

Here Comes A New Challenger: Super Amoled HD Plus Alpha 3

In the world of technology you never replace a good brand, you just keep adding to it.  Think back to the great series of Street Fighter games, starting with Street Fighter II which culminated with Super Street Fighter II Turbo, which came after Street Fighter Alpha 3.  It seems this is the nomenclature that is now de facto in mobile phone screen displays.  Not content with Super AMOLED, Samsung pushed on to add a Plus, then HD and apparently for the next device (the Note II missed out on this), Super AMOLED HD Plus.  What on earth will be in the Note 3 or Galaxy S4?  Super AMOLED HD Plus Alpha 3 Hyper-fighting edition?  Then again, maybe the screen name has to keep up with the increasing pixel size of the screen...

Have Brackets Killed The Oxford Comma?

Just like Video Killed The Radio Star, it seems to me that Brackets have killed the Oxford comma.  Now I'm sure some of you will be wondering, "who gives a fuck about and Oxford comma", whilst watching your English dramas...  Well Stephen Colbert cares that's who!  Let me give you an example that is only clear in a world where an Oxford comma exists.  I went on holiday last moth with my parents, Dizzy Gillespie and a French whore.  Now, how many people did I go on holiday with?  If an Oxford comma exists then it was two, my parents who are Dizzy Gillespie and a French whore.  Otherwise I would have written 'my parents, Dizzy Gillespie, and a French whore' - did you notice the Oxford comma after 'Gillespie'?  Clearly that list is of four people.  But in a world of business-speak, which is almost as bad as newspeak, if there was such ambiguity in a sentence then the most common solution would be to use brackets, e.g. can you book a table for lunch for the two tech leads (Jane and Simon).  And if you don't even revert to using brackets to avoid the ambiguity then maybe you won't keep your business role for much longerer...

How Not To Write You Are A Psychic On LinkedIn

Now, I'm not saying I have special extrasensory perception, but I am safely going to gamble this is not how to use LinkedIn to promote yourself as a Psychic:

Current Job - "Psychic Tarot Reader"

Education - "BTEC ... didnt [sic] get to finish these courses due to unforeseen circumstances"

Next!

Ly-Canth Not Believe This 'Were' My Hallowe'en Costume...

It's a full moon.  It's Hallowe'en.  And it seems I've 'turned' into a sexy werewolf...  Or maybe this has nothing to do with the time of the month and the month of the year, and it just so happens I'm a pretty hairy little monkey...!  Loup Garou!

Rekorderlig Made This Man-Go (Rasp-) Berry Happy!

Rekorderlig have done it again!  After the failed 'Apricot & Peach' which only seems to be available in Tesco, Rekorderlig hit the sweet spot with Orange & Ginger cider.  In an unusual bar this weekend, filled with Friday evening work refugees, I spied yet another wild sounding cider: Mango & Raspberry.  So how does it taste?  Incredible!  As you can see it's a red drink but the mango really works and it's a refreshing and very drinkable beverage from the world leaders in fruit cider making!  Please don't stop innovating Rekorderlig!

Worst Hallowe'en Decorations Ever At The Dome, Edinburgh

Sigh...  We haven't even reached Hallowe'en yet and The Dome has their Christmas decorations up.  Why couldn't they have gone to this effort for All Hallows' Eve...?

via http://instagr.am/p/RSiYG1oIxW/

If New Instagram Photo Then Post To Blog

Over the years I've taken a lot of photos, and Instagram allows me to quickly snap something and push it out to my feed, as well as Twitter and Facebook but not Blogger :(  Despite Instagram not having a web feed, you can view my current photos and captions at gramfeed.

So thanks to If This Then That (IFTTT) I've added a link that should mean my photos are added straight to this blog.  Hopefully it won't create double entries in other social media but we will see...  Now if only I could get this linked up properly to Google+ too I could have all my chickens in one basket ;)

UPDATE:  Okay, this auto-posting is causing duplicates in both Twitter and Facebook, so it's easier just to integrate my Instagram feed as my slideshow and manually post the best pictures.  Of course when IFTTT gets the option to add 'exceptions' then I can automate almost everything (will just be waiting for Google+ to provide API access)!

Canny Scots Cannae Infer Aliens From UFOs

Compare and contrast the automatic response of people living in the middle of nowhere in Scotland (specifically Fraserburgh) and those in America.  It's the middle of the night, you see freaky lights in the sky and you film them.  The national news picks up on it and asks for your opinion of what they were.  Calmly the Scots answer "I really do not know what it was. I know there are military exercises and there may be an explanation there. But why would we be the only people in the universe?".  Wonderful!  First say you don't know.  Then offer the most logical and sensible explanation, whilst keeping open that there are other (but less likely) explanations.  Calm, measured and sensible - despite being offered your 15 minutes of fame.  Kudos Morag Ritchie!

On a related note, there was and interesting UFO sighting over Edinburgh in the very early 1980s that was witnessed by many people...  Anyone else care to confirm this?  I Want To Believe!

EXCLUSIVE - Luis Suarez Gets Ignored By BBC (Just Like Refs)!

It's official!  Just as Brendan Rogers quite rightly complained that Luis Suarez's repeated calls for a penalty are being wrongly ignored by referees, it now turns out even the "impartial" BBC are ignoring Suarez in footballing terms by "suppressing" the fact that he's the joint second-top goal scorer with 5 goals in the Premier League!  Yet for some unknown reason they manage to make sure the Man Utd's Robin van Persie (who appears after Suarez alphabetically) is on the list.  Suspicious, no?!?  As verification you can see that Demba Ba has 6 goals (two of which he scored on Saturday) whilst Liverpool's 5-2 victory away at Norwich happened at the same time and is clearly listed in the Previous Results section right next to the Top Scorers (when Suarez scored a hat-trick from the edge / outside the box).  It's also repeated on the main Premier League page (see insert in the top right).  So BBC, referees - stop pretending Luis Suarez doesn't exist!

PS:  It's been a busy couple of months which has resulted in no posts.  That doesn't mean I haven't thought crazy things or noticed what passes other people by.  Hopefully a steadier stream for the rest of the year.

Edinburgh Festivals Start With A Jazz Mardi Gras

I know the Jazz and Blues Festival started yesterday, but I was working. So today, down in The Grassmarket, under blue skies and the sun smiling, my Edinburgh Festivals kicked off with the Mardi Gras. It's just a shame that they have not returned to Princes Street Gardens on the first Sunday to do the wonderful Jazz On A Summer's Day... This is what it used to look like, an here's a snap from today and how glorious the Gardens (East) are - Summer has arrived in Edinburgh at long last!

What's The French For "That's A Nice Pair" (Say Pear)..?

Ah, don't say pair, say Cidre Pear! After the very successful campaign launching Stella Artois Cidre, we now have a new flavour complementing the classic apple: Pear. It's a lovely clean, fresh colour and has that crispness of the original Cidre. So really the question should be, how do you say that's a lovely French pair..?