Scariest Movie In Years Is Amongst Us... Schizo!

Whilst waiting for The Joneses to start yesterday (good film, nice chemistry between some good characters and decent performances by Demi, David and Gary so 8/10), I saw a "teaser" trailer for what should be the scariest film in many years...  Schizo: The Movie.  Follow the link and watch the brief trailer for something that should be genuinely disturbing!  You have now been told...!

More Intelligent Audience Seen At Previous Senior Scottish Debates...

These "leader" debates are really starting to annoy me...  They are so damaging for politics in the country in a pathetic attempt to try to get more TV ratings and mislead the public.  We operate a representative democracy in the United Kingdom and there is no popular vote.  No one has the choice to vote between David Cameron, (James) Gordon Brown and Nick Clegg - they are all standing in different constituencies.  I think there should be far more local debates (that can still be televised) but are representative of local issues and candidates.  Here's the audience at the 2001 Election looking far more engaged when listening to a panel of Alistiar Darling, Sir Malcolm Rifkind and Alex Salmond, moderated by Sky's Adam Boulton:

BTW there is a far more intelligent (and less egotistical) man sitting to my right but I don't think he made it on camera :-(

Working Lunch To End ... What Will I Be On Next?

Only a few days after the announcement that Working Lunch's original host Adrian Chiles is leaving the BBC, an even bigger announcement comes that Working Lunch is to end.  Sad days...  Let's take a look back at on of their heydays when Adrian passes over to Rob who's "in Edinburgh [with] an unusual share club; they say they're not bothered if they don't make any money" who in turn interviews "a frighteningly well dressed bunch" (according to Adrian)....

'Shelter' Under Your Coat Or Away From Bad Direction?

At an unusual time of year a supernatural thriller akin to The Ring is released which naturally draws me to it.  Could it work?  First of all, yes, Shelter is like The Ring.  That is it has pointless cut aways and sudden close-ups just to try to build tension or make you jump, so it's quite frustrating.  The underlying story and what they are trying to do will be appreciated by fans of Ringu, the original Japanese masterpiece, despite the occasional ham-fisted way they go about directing it.  A quick overview of the film is Julianne Moore is a doctor of psychology who has disproved a murderer claiming to have genuine multiple Personality Disorder.  Then someone she occasionally works with (who happens to be her father, can't remember his name, so let's use Foxtrot for F, as in father), invites her to review a patient for him.  Foxtrot guy doesn't tell the Doctor all the info about this patient in advance and she discovers seemingly impossible things about him little by little, each time coming up with possible explanations.  There is one really interesting scene where (let's just abbreviate it further) Fox is playing basketball and the red-haired female Doctor storms in and a little exchange takes place where Fox tells her she has to open her mind to the possibilities of the world beyond the limits of her current scientific knowledge.  I think I've seen this somewhere before...  Was this something I made..?  :-)

Going in to see this film prep'ed with this information will probably help you enjoy it more despite some plot holes and questionable decisions by the characters.  The opening half an hour does swerve from place to place and I was unsure where they were trying to go with the film until it finally settled down with the story it wants to tell.  The acting from Jonathan as the patient in question is quite good although I wasn't impressed with the performance Julianne put in.  There are quite a few times where suspension of disbelief just falls apart and the film just feels too much like The Fourth Kind after you find out it's all fiction.  Despite all the criticism above, if you treat it as homage to the great show mentioned above, you can not only get through the film but also leave feeling pleased and mostly positive about the whole experience.  I even laughed with happiness...!

Trash of the Titans - Release the Krap in 3D!

I've been thinking for a while of how to summarise this bad remake of a bad movie (that's not a double negative by the way) and then, the most talented man on TV, Sir Dr. Stephen T. Colbert D.F.A., summarised it perfectly: "they made this film in 2D and then transformed it into 3D but, here's the clever part, all the characters stay 1D". Another bad film "starring" Sam Worthington. It is official, he is the new Christian Bale (like the world needed another one!). The torch seems to have been passed (or maybe the disease spread...) and another "leading" man who apparently can act (Sam won praise for his early roles, apparently) is now stinking up the screen like a piece of wet wood. The paper the script was written on should have stayed as trees, much like Terminator Salvation (where the infection happened) and even Avatar (overly long, poorly scripted, acted and directed and an offence to have it mentioned on the same list as The Hurt Locker). The disease even affects genuine actors around them like Liam Neeson and Sigourney Weaver who seem paralysed by the black hole sucking all ability out of the shot. Expect more years ahead of lifeless movies with Sam (and/or Christian) cast as the "hero". Please put me out of my misery and let me look into Medusa's eyes (the one part of the story that was authentic to the myth!)...

Help Find A Missing Girl: Laura Palmer. Posters All Around London

I've just passed a phonebox with a picture of an attractive young girl who went missing some time ago.  Unfortunately I was in a cab and couldn't take a picture of the phonebox near Whitehall but some kind soul (normko) has already done so in Hammersmith.  If you know anything at all about Laura Palmer I urge you to share that information with the world.  I certainly will...

Jon Stewart's Moment of Zen Is Sheer Heaven!

Jon Stewart is incredible.  Great host of the Oscars (mostly the second time that no-one watched), star of the latter series of The Larry Sanders Show and of course anchor for The Daily Show with Jon Stewart.  Last week they ended the show with their Moment of Xen which was a local news piece about the flooding in New Jersey and how these tough guys can't get across the street without a dingy.  Click on the clip but be warned, I had to pause it whilst watching because I was laughing so hard!  What a great way to start last week.

Topping this great observation, Jon ended the week by going full-speed at Glenn Beck and managed to draw some pretty unbelievable conclusions.  Now I'm sure to a lot of people the name Glenn Beck won't mean anything, to others he will always be the guy who sang Hi Ho Silver Lining or sister of the singer of First Time, First Kiss.  However anyone who has seen any non-fictional American TV will realise that Glenn has his own TV and radio show were he puts out, erm, fiction!  Well, to be technically accurate, his show is a right wing op-ed piece that spouts numerous conspiracy theories against the left / centre and how America is under seige.  Each show seems to have Glenn getting maniac and questioning whether he is the only crazy one (yes) or in fact is he the only sane one (definitely not).  He also has a penchant for getting tearful, pressing his fingers against his lips and saying "I'm sorry, I just love my country, and I fear for it".  You are well advised to watch Jon best Glenn at madness and brilliant reasoning.  Thanks Jon for being a shinning light from across the pond!

[Sadly although More4 screens The Daily Show here in the UK we can't watch the clips directly on The Daily Show's website.  Instead we have to go to Channel 4's VOD section which is only up for a week :(  Hurry hurry!]

I Love You I Love You Phillip Morris!

Nine months I've been waiting for this baby!  Okay that's the opening to a whole other post by a whole other person (and probably whole other sex too)...  But seriously, I naively believed that an independent film that stars Jim Carrey (big name but he does the odd independent such as Yes Man) and co-stars hometown hero Ewan McGregor (whose films are sometimes introduced by his mum if he has scheduling conflicts) would definitely be part of last year's EIFF.  Nope.  But it would be out soon after that though, it's going to be a big film!  How wrong I was.  Most of Europe got a release date by conservative Britain still did not have an announced distributor.  Finally, at very short notice, I Love You Phillip Morris has a release date which has now arrived and the title says it all!  I love you I Love You Phillip Morris!  In case you have no idea what this film is about, basically Jim Carrey is gay and goes to gaol (or jail as it is set in Texas) and falls in love with his one true love, Ewan McGregor.  It's funny, has a great plot, based on a real story, good acting and is very fresh.  So why has it taken so long to be released and why are the US only getting it for the start of May on a very limited release?   Could it have anything to do with Ewan and Jim making out with each other, plus a couple of gay sex scenes (one that is relatively graphic)?  Nah, that can't be the reason for Liberal America...  I'm actually a little surprised there hasn't been a mini-whinge about it here by the usual suspects.  Oh well, I don't care because I've seen it and it's fabulous and you should do the same darlings...!

Wow! Wonderus Alice Already Usurps Avatar

At the very end of 2009 a massive deal was made about the first full-3D live-action movie, Avatar.  It's a decent romp but the 3D and graphical effects contribute a lot to making it enjoyable.  Now barely 3 months later, the genius of Tim Burton brings a full 3D film to life with much better effects and imagination (think seriously heavy trip), plus previously absent things like a script and reasonable acting.  To quote Stephen Colbert (talking 'Empire State of Mind' as the new king compared to the previous top dog 'New York, New York'), "you can take that thing [Avatar] and throw it in the trash".  Avatar is not a great movie by any means.  It is entertaining primarily due to its stunning visuals and unique technology.  It has been truly bested on all levels by Alice In Wonderland.  The only tiny issue is a personal one, as near the beginning of the film other characters question 'who is Alice?' and I kept having a non-PG lyric running through my head...  Anyway, it is stunning and why Disney would want this be released on DVD in 12 weeks and so prevent it being on the big screen (and not in Odeons!) for less than the normal 17 week run is baffling, it would not be as much of a must-see in normal 2D (although still probably a little bit better than 'The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus').

Sky 3D Football Is Better Than Being There!

What was I thinking?  At the end of January I read a leak of the 9 pubs across the UK that were going to show the Man Utd - Arsenal game on Sunday afternoon in 3D, complete with polarising glasses.  I did have an appointment I had to keep and, guessing that it could be duff information, I opted not to go.  Damn.  It turns out it was Belushi's on Market Street that showed the game, apparently on one 42" LG 3D TV.  Anyway, that was then and it completely went out of my mind, even despite recent talk that Sky are launching their 3D channel this Autumn (yep, I know it says April there but the advert I'm getting on to said Autumn).  So, whilst waiting for Alice In Wonderland to start, Sky run (what I believe to be their first 3D adverts) showing Everton in 3D and OMG!  It was incredible!  Better than being in the stands (not that I've ever been to Goodison) as you are so close to the action and as the ball was lofted into the penalty area you became so much more aware of the opportunity as if you had crossed it yourself!  Forget sports in HD, 3D is the only way to go!  Now the only question is can I justify £6,000 for a 42" TV...? :(

What Is Real? It Seems Everything On TV Is Fake!

There are many things in life that make me question my beliefs and assumptions about the world.  In the realms of TV, I believed very little of what I saw.  In fact, I should have believed even less as the few things I knew were real ... have turned out to be fake!  The world is not as my TV tells me, locations aren't as they appear and, not in an environmentalist way, the world is green!  Am I just babbling nonsense?  Probably, so watch this video from Stargate Studios and be prepared to never again look at a TV show the same...  Credit to TV Squad for posting this first and me for having the ability to read that post!

Why Is Michael McIntyre Starring As The Wolfman?

Just back from watching The Wolfman and there are several things that have surprised me about this film.  I believe it has been delayed by many months which it spent in post-production and I'm pleased that this hasn't made it into a long and drawn out film.  Yes, it is a little bit schizophrenic at times, but the acting, the direction, the sets, the special effects and the make up are all very professional.  In fact on the, I'm stunned how they managed to take 21st Century comedy maestro Michael McIntyre and age him slightly to be the lead actor:

The film is quite enjoyable, doesn't bore you at any point and has a nice sprinkling of loud noises / jump out scenes as well as some hardcore gore (similar to Daybreakers in not pulling any punches).  From the opening titles, you realise that this is a remake of a classic Hammer horror film about "The Wolfman".  It's not a serious thriller about werewolves nor a teen flick about love between monsters.  All it tries to do is tell the story of this one Wolfman and it does that pretty well.  That said, there are times especially in the first half hour were the direction and acting comes across as a serious drama or suspense thriller which at the time does confuse you.  When you leave and you recall the opening titles, the main sequence in the middle and the closing scene, you know that it is very good and modern Hammer horror film which does entertain.

Exclusive: Toy Story 3's European Premiere Will Be At EIFF 2010!

That's right, and you really did read it here first!  The 64th Edinburgh International Film Festival host the European Première of Toy Story 3, most likely on the afternoon of Saturday 19th June, 2010.  Where did I get my red-hot exclusive from you ask?  My brain.  In 2008 the UK premiere of Wall.E was 24 hours after the American launch on a Saturday afternoon and about a month before the launch in the rest of the UK.  Taking a quick peek over at IMDB we see the global launch of Toy Story 3 is 16th - 18th June with the UK release set for five weeks later on 23rd July.  You don't have to be a genius, although I may very well be, it's just not required.  Now there is just the small matter of waiting 7 months until the EIFF box office opens.  Oh yeah, that and negotiating with Pixar / Disney to get the rights to scoop the rest of Europe (excluding Cannes) to make this happen (but this is really a small detail isn't it).  Remember you read it here first and remember that you've got a friend in me...