Edinburgh Festivals Start With A Jazz Mardi Gras

I know the Jazz and Blues Festival started yesterday, but I was working. So today, down in The Grassmarket, under blue skies and the sun smiling, my Edinburgh Festivals kicked off with the Mardi Gras. It's just a shame that they have not returned to Princes Street Gardens on the first Sunday to do the wonderful Jazz On A Summer's Day... This is what it used to look like, an here's a snap from today and how glorious the Gardens (East) are - Summer has arrived in Edinburgh at long last!

What's The French For "That's A Nice Pair" (Say Pear)..?

Ah, don't say pair, say Cidre Pear! After the very successful campaign launching Stella Artois Cidre, we now have a new flavour complementing the classic apple: Pear. It's a lovely clean, fresh colour and has that crispness of the original Cidre. So really the question should be, how do you say that's a lovely French pair..?

A Very Perculiar Chocolate - Marmite Flavoured!

I couldn't bring myself to buy this... As much as I loved the Marmite advert featuring Zippy, and the packaging looks elegant, I really can't see myself eating Marmite Chocolate! Can you..?

Happy Bastille Day From The Place That Inspired Napoleon Bonaparte!

According to the secondary source known as Wikipedia, Lord Street in Southport (Merseyside, previously Lancashire), was not only where Napoleon Bonaparte lived before becoming President (well just off Lord Street), it was also the inspiration for the beautiful tree lined boulevards in Paris with quaint arcades off the buildings.

Why Wait 2 Weeks? I Already Have Now '82

Sigh... Okay, some songs were recorded in 1982 but officially it was released in 1983 (source Wikipedia) but still, Now 82 means Now '82 to me! Feeling old...

Orange & Ginger Is Good, So Long As It's Not In A Scottish Tanning Salon!

Rekorderlig launch another great new flavour, possibly only in pubs right now... Tesco are selling Apricot & Peach but pubs, including Milnes on Hanover Street, are selling a delicious Orange & Ginger cider. This is not the first time these flavours have been combined, Crabbies have a special Orange Edition of their Ginger Beer but really it's not great and is a bit too sweet (bet you didn't know I spoke French!). As always Rekorderlig's ciders are not overly sweet and have a perfect balance of flavours. I strongly recommend you try and find it, more so than Koppaberg's Cloudberry.

The British Icon (BA) Is Back In "You Only Fail Twice"

Well done!  I'm usually irked by the word "fail".  For me you can put it in the same category as other short term pseudo technical words that the masses adopt, well, en masse.  But when British Airways manages to fail to load their own brand new "transfer BMI points to us" page (frame) and then hits the ultra-rare 'double-fail', even I relent and think that's impressive!  So behold, British Airway's beautiful double-fail:

I'm On Cloud Nine With Kopparberg's Cloudberry Cider!

Okay, maybe I just hyped it up for that headline (or Instagram post)... Truth is Cloudberry is a light, sweet and very fragrant cider that is exclusive to Belhaven Pubs (such as The Black Bull in Edinburgh). Kopparberg make decent ciders but compared to their countrymen at Rekorderlig they just miss a sharpness and clarity. But that said they are a lot better than Bulmers (Scottish & Newcastle brand, not the original Irish Magners).

My Soft Pink Dismembered Member Flops Out On My Bed

Nothing to see here, just that I can remove my soft pink thing (with bulb-shape thing underneath) and just leave it lying out on my hotel bed...

In case anyone is really wondering, it's my camera cover!  I call it William...  Or sometimes Richard...

Paying A Pretty Woman A Compliment Makes Me Gay?

Picture the scene, you bump into a girl you haven't seen in ages at a wedding and notice her dress. You pay her an observant compliment and in reply you are asked if you are gay!

Me: Wow, you look like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman!

Her: You're the only person to have noticed that! I love that film, that's why I bought the dress! Are you sure you're not gay?!

Top Marks For Top Shop's Sign To Nowhere

"Entrance this way" with no arrow on a walkway that has people going in both directions is not a helpful sign. Then again maybe it's for the best...

Taking Your Cherry Shouldn't Leave A Bad Taste In My Mouth

Does it get any better than this? All the best bits of Cherry Coke less the nasty sugary after taste plus the better taste of Pepsi! Plus you can still sing the Savage Garden line "like drinking Cherry Cola". Only downside is that I have only found Pepsi Max Cherry in 2 litre bottles so far. Cans please PepsiCo!

Proof Babies Are Nothing But Trouble (By Dragonfly)

Babies are notoriously trouble to such an extent that Dragonfly (111 Broughton Street, Edinburgh) decided to display this apt baby-grow (or whatever it's called). "Been inside for 9 months... " - pure gold!

Why Do Nearly Naked Men Crucify People Upside-Down?

I'm struggling to make sense of the world right now...  Walking along York Place I see a group of men walking along in the bus lane, nearly naked, carrying a large and heavy wooden structure.  Catching up with them as they turn left to get to Multrees Walk I can their "friend" on an inverted crucifix with his blonde hair flopping down.  Lifting over the bollards wasn't easy and it clear takes a lot of effort.  Can anyone tell me why they would be doing this?  It seems too intense for a stag party, plus everyone seemed relatively fit.  Perhaps an end-of-season team event due to a lost bet..?

Is This The Greatest Children's Playground Ever?

Not sure what the motivation here is on Lamma Island... They have done some work on their children's playground and right now it has extra ladders, metal bars, bundles of wires and ropes, plus the obligatory warning / danger signs. Why not just open the venue to the kids now? It's what every (male) child would put into the fantasy playground...! Safety rules gone mad...

HD TV On A Bus? Better Pictures Than Looking Out The Window

Yep, free WiFi on a bus is a great step forward but there had to be a next level. And it seems that is HD TV Channel on-board. What could be the motivation for this? See the route map as if it were outside your window? Or be sold to by adverts inside in great quality rather than those lofi versions up on billboards or in lame neon tubes...

Drinking Coffee Makes Coffee Mugs Depressed

Aww, poor thing! My coffee mug this morning seems depressed that I'm drinking coffee out of him... Or am I just misinterpreting (t)his enigmatic smil(i)e and is this in fact Art..? Answers on a melancholic postcard to the usual address...

Scaffolding Sprouts Up As Quick As Bamboo In Hong Kong

Danger: Mem working at great height above. On scaffolding. Made out of bamboo. Wow! Apparently it's very strong and lightweight so a great material. Think I'd prefer metal though...

Advertising Location Is Better Than Location Location

It seems battles can still rage even after one party wins a coveted location... Here on Hong Kong Island KFC clearly have a great location, so much so that McDonald's wants to advertise right next to it! Naturally KFC decide to place a huge advert right above their own store. Madness...

My First Taste Of China, Just Past Customs

My first ever sight of "China" (well, Hong Kong) , as I exit Customs at Hong Kong airport. It's amazing how exotic and eastern it looks...