My Soft Pink Dismembered Member Flops Out On My Bed

Nothing to see here, just that I can remove my soft pink thing (with bulb-shape thing underneath) and just leave it lying out on my hotel bed...

In case anyone is really wondering, it's my camera cover!  I call it William...  Or sometimes Richard...

Paying A Pretty Woman A Compliment Makes Me Gay?

Picture the scene, you bump into a girl you haven't seen in ages at a wedding and notice her dress. You pay her an observant compliment and in reply you are asked if you are gay!

Me: Wow, you look like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman!

Her: You're the only person to have noticed that! I love that film, that's why I bought the dress! Are you sure you're not gay?!

Top Marks For Top Shop's Sign To Nowhere

"Entrance this way" with no arrow on a walkway that has people going in both directions is not a helpful sign. Then again maybe it's for the best...

Taking Your Cherry Shouldn't Leave A Bad Taste In My Mouth

Does it get any better than this? All the best bits of Cherry Coke less the nasty sugary after taste plus the better taste of Pepsi! Plus you can still sing the Savage Garden line "like drinking Cherry Cola". Only downside is that I have only found Pepsi Max Cherry in 2 litre bottles so far. Cans please PepsiCo!

Proof Babies Are Nothing But Trouble (By Dragonfly)

Babies are notoriously trouble to such an extent that Dragonfly (111 Broughton Street, Edinburgh) decided to display this apt baby-grow (or whatever it's called). "Been inside for 9 months... " - pure gold!

Why Do Nearly Naked Men Crucify People Upside-Down?

I'm struggling to make sense of the world right now...  Walking along York Place I see a group of men walking along in the bus lane, nearly naked, carrying a large and heavy wooden structure.  Catching up with them as they turn left to get to Multrees Walk I can their "friend" on an inverted crucifix with his blonde hair flopping down.  Lifting over the bollards wasn't easy and it clear takes a lot of effort.  Can anyone tell me why they would be doing this?  It seems too intense for a stag party, plus everyone seemed relatively fit.  Perhaps an end-of-season team event due to a lost bet..?